And we have been so excited to let them in on the numerous reasons of why we feel called and why we're choosing to adopt. When explaining this to people we then proceed to get questions about different aspects of the process. Although I will admit we are no where near knowing every answer, God has provided us with enough of the answers that we feel assured of our calling to adopt.
- So what made you decide to adopt? We have recently come to realize the tremendous picture that our marriage is in depicting Christ's love for his Bride the Church. In this we began to read more in depth into our own salvation and adoption by Christ as son's and daughters. We feel called to adopt and try to live out James 1:27 Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.
- How do you know if you'd love them like you would your "own child"? We feel that Christ shows us his love and that he loves us as much as he did his own son, so the issue or loving a biological child more or less than an adopted child is not really an issue at all...we will love them the same.
- Are you going to tell them they are adopted? Yes, Christ makes it known that HE adopted us! And not to mention they could look a lot NOT like us. :)
- Isn't it expensive to adopt? Yes but how much more expensive was HIS adoption of us...it cost him his own son's life on the cross! And yes we plan to fund raise and build things to cover the costs.
- What if they don't want to leave and go with you? The way we see it is we are daily still kicking and screaming to go back to our sin and to the world and Jesus holds on to us and says "what I have is so much better for you" so we expect them to adjust but we once again see a tremendous picture in this.
- One more reason that we are following this path is a little more tricky to say for fear of hurting feelings. When we talked about it we think there is going to be something so powerful in Choosing to do this first over having biological children first. The reason this is a tricky explanation is that adoption for some people is a very tender subject and it is their second option. We want this child(ren) to know that we are choosing them first. In the words of our good friend Piper "Adoption in God’s mind was not Plan B. Adoption was not second best. It was planned from the beginning." and so we are trying to model Christ in this way as well, with making this our plan A and choosing adoption first, with the utmost respect for those who have chosen it as a second option or as a option at any point.
- What agency are you using? We have chosen Lifeline Children's Services. They are based in Birmingham, AL and are a wonderful Christian, God guided ministry. They have an office in Nashville and have an amazing staff from what we have experienced so far.
- Do you want a little baby? How old do you think they will be? Well we're not really sure. The more we try to put our "preferences" into this process the more they become small details. God seems to make it pretty clear that he is behind this entire thing and that it's not really going to be about our preferences of a boy over a girl or a healthy child vs a special needs child....it's going to be a child or children that God has for us and we desire to be satisfied in that.
- Where are you looking to adopt from? Right now our hearts are drawn toward Columiba, although our ages and length of marriage limit us to only a few select countries. We feel a strong draw to South America since Nick's family is from Bolivia, but Bolivia has very
difficultimpossible guidelines for adopting and there hasn't been one in years from there. Columbia and a few countries in Africa seem to have much more stable programs and so we are choosing them. - How can we help? First we ask that you pray for us in this journey. We need a support group like you wouldn't believe. We need people to tell us the good the bad and the ugly. We also need to begin raising financial support and would love it if you would pray about the opportunity to help us financially as well.
- How long will it take? The process varies from country to country but they estimate 3-4 years for a healthy child and 18-24 months for a special needs or special characteristics case. We are praying about considering a child with a special need or a sibling group which is also considered a special need.
That being said...this is going to be a long process...So if you have other questions of us please feel free to ask. We are open books and want to be a picture of Christ as much as we can during this process. We have been given great advice so far about the ups and downs and rejoicing and heartbreak that all come along with this process.
We ask that you would begin to pray for us and our soon to be family. Please pray that God would guide us and our agency in making the right decisions and being the best stewards of God's resources.