Week 1.5

Well we've been home almost a week and a half and life is MOVING! Whew, the days are going fast and they are adjusting great to living in the US of A. They are a little hot here as it never got above like 70 there so we found out they sweat like crazy! They love their beds and the girls fight over the top bunk!

School is going well for both Brandon (1st grade) and Michelle (pre-k). We are having some difficulties with Daniella's learning abilities/disabilities and getting her settled into a school routine and in the right class. We actually have them all 3 with me at school so that is a huge blessing. The teachers and friends that prayed alongside us for so long are now the ones loving on them for the majority of the day. We have a lot to work on with her specifically and navigating the "system" for any special help in Knoxville is HARD and time consuming. We have some great resources and are exploring those right now too.

We have made good progress at home too. When school is difficult or anything gets "hard" we try to remember that we are so blessed....they eat almost ANYTHING, they sleep about 10-11 hours a night! Still no bathroom accidents day or night! Our attitudes and English are improving a little every day. They are still testing us daily with things. They are slowly giving up on getting into EVERYTHING in our house! They love the dogs, and the dogs love them.

My sister Amanda has been here a few days and been such a help with the kids when one of us has to be at work or need extra homework help. I secretly hope she's not running up a bill on us because live in nanny, cook and tutor is quite expensive I'm sure. :)

Nick and I are staying afloat mentally and spiritually but some days are tough. We were at home last week, kids in bed, and heard a loud crash. Nick's car was on the street parked in front of our house and a neighbor smashed into his honda. This was our car that was paid off so now we are dealing with their insurance and it should be totaled by the end of the week. On a bright note, we were so used to having NO car in Colombia that us only have one here for right now has actually worked out ok. As of last night they got Nick a rental car and we are figuring things out past that, but it's cool to have seen our perspective change and us be totally happy just to HAVE a car to get them around in.

Prayers:
- Continued bonding with the kids. Our post placement visit (to see how they are doing) is in a few weeks too.
-That we can get Daniella settled in a class and that her ability to learn would increase. We are starting from square one with letters A-D and numbers 1-3 today. Its a long road and her attention span is not helping.
-Time for Nick and I to spend together focusing on us and not always the kids
-Car situation to get worked out

Praises:
-Our jobs are still flexible with us working hours around the kids adjusting
-We all are adjusting well to being home
-Amanda is a huge help to us at home when she's here things are just easier
-Michelle and Brandon have made huge progress in school and they are so proud
-they continue to eat and sleep well

Thank you guys for lifting these things up and joining alongside us for the long haul.

We love you,

 Brandon Daniella and Michelle.

Coming home

We come home on Friday September 19th. BUT, due to a long layover, we are driving home from the Atlanta airport. Since we will not get to have y'all welcome us home that night...
We'd love to invite you to our house on Saturday September 20th anytime after 2:00 pm.

We would love you to meet the kids and honestly we'd love some hugs too! We've missed everyone so much and our kids are excited be home in Tennessee! I'm sure we'll be doing some laundry and cleaning up around the house, we'll be playing with our much missed dogs, and just chilling around the house.
Please do not feel obligated to come over that day and seriously they are our kids for life so if you cannot come you'll meet them eventually!

We have something we'd love you to read, regardless of if you come Saturday or not. We know you guys are our biggest advocates and love us so much. We need your help in spreading the info on these pages as we adjust to being home and parenting 3 kids. Please feel free to send/share the below with anyone you would like:

We appreciate that you care about our family. We cannot thank you enough for wanting to learn more about supporting and understanding the adoptive family and for helping make this transition as smooth as possible for all of us! Please note that most of these are suggestions from blogs, books, and have been found helpful from numerous adoptive families. We have added some things and taken away some thing and left some as “general” . 

-Love 

• If you'd like to offer support (meal, help with house cleaning, etc) when an adopted child joins the family,  please do it even if we don't reach out and ask.Many of us won't specifically ask for help or tell you what we need. However, I don't know a single adoptive mom who would turn down an offer to have a group of friends tidy/clean her house during those first few weeks at home with a new child. How wonderful would a meal be when the kids are crazy from 3 days of doctor visits? Likewise, cookies and ice cream are most always welcome and might be exactly what a new adoptive mom needs to get through those challenging times of adjustment!

• Please don't try to get our children to like you the most.Attachment and bonding are challenging enough without having friends and family slip our children candy, shower them with gifts, offer seconds at meals or encourage bending and stretching of family rules. We're already working our tails off to get them to like us! With consistency and time they will learn to like you too, we promise.

• Attachment takes time and work.It doesn't happen overnight. Even if it appears that our kids are securely attached to us it may take many months or years and every child and every family bonds differently. Many times we're faking it until we make it but one day we will wake up and realize that we're not faking it anymore and that our love is deep and real. We have not woken up to this yet, so please just remember we are trying to get them to love and trust us and it stinks to love someone so much and know they don’t fully love you back YET.
• Parenting an adopted child is hard work and we struggle.  We may tell you that we’re okay when we're really falling apart. We're worried that if we are honest about how difficult it is that you won't understand and that you'll think we're nuts. Adding children who may or may not have anything in common with us socially, culturally, biologically or even personality-wise is challenging. Though undoubtedly beautiful and worth all of the struggles, adoption certainly isn't always easy or pretty.
• We may discourage too much physical contact with our child for the first couple months that they are home or until we feel like they are securely attached to us.Please do not insist on holding them too much, hugging them too much or having them sit on your lap. In Colombia, it is cultural for them to hug and kiss everyone they see. We want to teach them that they only hug and kiss family and friends that we trust. We need your help in breaking this habit with them. Even though all of you are family and close friends they do not know you well yet and we want to teach them they need to really know someone to offer that affection to them.  Many children who have lived in orphanages and institutions learn to fight for adult attention. Often they can put on quite the show and act like the most friendly, cute, charming child to draw attention to themselves.
• Please do not disappear.If we thought the waiting stage was hard, it does not even hold the barest candle to what comes after we meet them. Not. The. Barest. Candle. Never have I felt so isolated and petrified. Never have I been so overwhelmed and exhausted. We need you after the airport way more than we ever needed you before. I know you’re scared of us, but please find ways to stick around. Call. Email. Check in. Post on our Facebook walls. Send us funny cards. Keep this behavior up for longer than six days. Parents who have recently added a child through adoption need support, friendship, love and encouragement. Even if we're somewhat withdrawn and spending a lot of time at home with our new additions, we value our friendships. 
• If you were in our life before we still want you in our life and in the lives of our children!Please don't feed the kids if we are around and available to instead. We want them to learn to love us, before they bond with extended family, neighbors and friends. Since we were not there to meet their early needs (breast or bottle feeding, comforting them when they were sick, changing diapers, kissing boo boos) we need to make up for it by meeting as many of their physical and emotional needs as possible now. We have been able to do this nonstop in Colombia so far but being home brings in much more people. We also are trying to make sure they know rules about food, and we like to know how much and what they are eating so we can judge behaviors etc.
• Sometimes adopted children need to be parented differently than biological children. We are not spoiling them. We aren't making excuses for poor behavior. Rather, we are parenting a child whose background may be very dissimilar to anything we've experienced. A child who has been abandoned and who has a fear of abandonment shouldn't be sent to time out alone in another room, we try to sit with them, as annoying as it is. The types of consequences that work for other children might not work for a child who doesn't have the same sense of value of their possessions and who doesn't understand what it means to have privileges. As parents, we must be flexible to help meet the individual needs of our children even if it means that we do things a little differently sometimes. We also are un-doing years of bad habits and ways we would NOT have parented, so that is a constant struggle with all 3 of them.
• If you would like to give a gift to our new children, please consider something small that the whole family can enjoy together.A few ideas are a frozen meal, a gift card to the movies, buying clothes that save us money or art supplies for all of the kids to share. We know that you want to welcome our new additions but gifts can be overwhelming for children who have had few material possessions. Also, we want our children to learn to love you for who you are, not for the fact that they hope they'll get another gift the next time they see you again.
• It takes time to help children start to heal from a difficult past.Just because they have been with us for a certain amount of time does not mean that the are "fixed". On the other hand, just because children are adopted does not necessarily mean that they will be any more difficult, defiant, less successful or anything else as teenagers or adults. Even the happiest of adoptions are a result of challenging or difficult circumstances. 
• Though we like to think of adoption as a "happy ending", birth parents may have made difficult decisions, children may have faced losses and many lives were forever changed. Though most adopted children grow to be happy, well-adjusted adults and though most adoptive families are beautiful and full of love, it is important not to romanticize adoption.If we’ve adopted older kids, please do not ask them if they “love America so much” or are “so happy to live in Tennessee.” It’s this simple: adoption is born from horrible loss. In an ideal world, there would be no adoption, because our children would be with their birth families, the way God intended. Adoption is one possible answer to a very real tragedy. There is genuine grief and sorrow when your biological family is disrupted by death and poverty, and our kids have endured all this and more. So when you ask my 8-year-old if he is thrilled to be in Tennessee, please understand that he might not be. He misses his country, his language, his food, his foster family. Please don’t make them smile and lie to you about how happy they are to be here.
• Thank you for getting excited with us over our little victories. I realize it sounds like a very small deal when we tell you our 6 year old is now sleeping with her door half way closed, but if you could’ve seen the epic level of freakoutedness this door caused for the first three weeks, you would understand that this is really something. When you encourage us over our incremental progress, it helps. You remind us that we ARE moving forward and these little moments are worth celebrating. If we come to you spazzing out, please remind us where we were a month ago. Force us to acknowledge their gains. Be a cheerleader for the healing process.
• Come over one night after our kids are asleep and sit with us on our porch. Let me tell you: we are all lonely in those early weeks. We are home, home, home, home, home. Good-bye, date nights. Good-bye, spontaneous anything. Good-bye, big public outings. Good-bye, community group. Good-bye, nightlife. We know its not forever but it feels like it at the moment. So please bring some community to our doorstep. Bring friendship back into our lives. Bring adult conversation and laughter. And bring a really good football game!
• Here’s one last thing: As you watch us struggle and celebrate and cry and flail, we also want you to know that adoption is beautiful, and a hundred times we’ve looked at each other and said, “What if we would’ve said no?” God invited us into something monumental and lovely, and we would’ve missed endless moments of glory had we walked away. We need you during these difficult months of transitioning, but we also hope you see that we serve a faithful God who heals and actually sets the lonely in families, just like He said He would. And even through the tears and tantrums (ours), we look at our children and marvel that God counted us worthy to raise them. We are humbled. We’ve been gifted with a very holy task, and when you help us rise to the occasion, you have an inheritance in their story; your name will be counted in their legacy.
• Also please remember no one is perfect.If you slip and ask “how much did they cost” or if you've already asked "What happened to their mother?" we won't hold a grudge. We know that our family is different. We understand that it is impossible to be sensitive and politically correct in every situation all the time. And we don’t expect you to be. We sure don’t have all this figured out yet either!

Thank you for being the village that will help us raise these kids. You are so important to us.

Setencia

We got the phone call this morning!!
We got Setencia!! 

That means the judge has signed his part and is just waiting on the children's defender and us to sign! The defender is out sick today so they are looking for a replacement to sign if they can today, if not then tomorrow. We go to sign in the morning if they get all the right signatures today and then we drive to their 3 separate birth towns 1 hour+ away and get their NEW birth certificates. Worst case we drive to the towns on Thursday. They will have OUR names on them and the kids will be forever Sanjines kiddos!!

Thank you for praying for this to happen quickly. This also means we should be good to come home on September 19th, pending no major issues with 3 kids new passports, visas etc.
Still a few hoops but we can finally breath and tell the kids NEXT WEEK we come home as a family of 5!!!
Praising God all day! And....wait for it....its actually sunny today!
For Nick, he's got a cough and has a lot of work to do today and tomorrow with a release at work, praying he feels better but this news makes us all feel better!!

Prayers:

Praise: Kids all have low 99.0 fevers today and Mami is holding strong with NO sickness!!

Till they're home,

Nick, Jenn and Tres Ninos!

Fifth Update from Colombia

Another update from Colombia was the subject of our last email out to family and friends:I realize that subject made it sounds like some super big news happened, sorry it has not yet. Keep praying though. We are hopeful that the Judge here will sign this week and we prefer it be at the beginning of the week. 

About the time that Ashlee wrapped up her trip here we decided to have a rest day. Ever since then at least one of the kids has been some sort of sick. We've had mostly just fever until today when fever turned into throwing up for Brandon. We have been able to work as a team, stay well, and care for the kids. I cannot imagine taking care of sick kids on top of work but even in those discussions here we have realized when we get home, God has already provided a way by Nick being able to work from home in those situations and me being at school with the kids I could run them home if they got sick.
Them being sick sure makes us miss our support of you guys in person. I called my dad almost in tears the other morning as we woke up to Brandon crying and had a 103.5 fever! Yikes! Today he was unable to keep down medicine so we gave him a luke-warm bath and he seems to be doing well enough to go to sleep. 

On a positive note all 3 kids took a nap today! That is a first!! Jenn got to go to the market to shop for some gifts for family and friends and Nick got to watch football while they slept!
They are troopers I'll tell you what! They try to explain what hurts, we point to every body part and we hug them and say sorry. We don't know much else to do but to love them through it and use the medicine we have or can buy here. We have resorted to blowing kisses for today and tomorrow and they are not thrilled about that but we remind them we don't want them sick.

We also talked to Delta Airlines today and got our plane tickets booked to come home. I say that in an excited and nervous tone. Since the Judge has not signed yet, we technically could still need to change them. Again, here is where you come in big time with prayers. Either way my best friend phrased it, "that's next week!" I looked at the calendar and sure enough September 19th is actually next week! We'd love to have you pray that that date works out. We would actually be flying to Atlanta and driving home from there instead of eating 6 hours of layover at the airport with 3 jet lagged kiddos. Please pray that date works for us a few reasons: A) for our sanity, we're about over it here. B) for the kids starting school (that date would give us a good solid week of at home time before beginning school C) That date has some cool details in it...

Details: God is all about them, that has sort of been our "motto" through this whole thing and I hope it will continue to be. So last year on September 18th we got an email from our agency saying they had 3 kiddos files. I was like 3! Whew, ages... 3.5.7.at the time. We looked at their files and I noticed a date on the front of the packet. September 19th, 2011. Their date of resolution of adaptability. The date their parental rights were terminated and they became children of Colombia. So exactly two years after they had officially become orphans, we spent the good part of the night praying for them. God laid on our hearts that these kids had NEVER been prayed for. See blog for a cool post on this. Right Here but we prayed for them anyway. We actually took over 6 months to officially commit to them; but we never again prayed the same way about a group of kids the way we did about them that night. It was a cool couple of days last September, never did we think we'd be here with them in the room next to us calling us Papi and Mami. 

Needless to say, those couple of days are special to us. Please pray we get to make them even more special and make God even more glorified in His details that he knew before any of us were born!
We love each one of you! We will keep you updated this week on the judge and if he signs we will let you know as soon as we do!

Prayers:

-Judge to sign Setencia soon
-That sickness would not spread and that Nick and I would stay healthy and get them well
-Flight date we have chosen that it work out well, all details of process to finish smoothly
-continue to learn English words and phrases
-for us to show them what a "good attitude" means and to teach them to love one another because of Christ's love
-That we would continue to adjust to this crazy new life and trust God's plan for it all, it's honestly overwhelming some days and we've realized our lives will never look the same, but you guys are so encouraging to remind us that is what he's called us to.... we don't want our lives to look the same after he's been at work!

Praises:

-We were able to handle our first fevers, throwing up, and colds without dr visits or too much panic
-Church here at Vida Bogota continues to be a blessing while we miss our home
-we've gotten to have some much needed "lazy" days
-still sleeping well and through the night (all of us)
-Michelle is warming up to Jenn more and more

- Seeing them sing and dance in Church here is one of our favorite parts in a week! 

Playing with PlayDough for the first time! 

What the girls did while we watched football. 

What Nick did while he watched football. 

Fourth Update in Country

We held off on posting this to wait and see if we got good news from the court today and WE DID!! Happy Labor Day! Apparently while Americans are off today the courts here are still open and the Judge accepted our case today! It has been in a court here for a little shy of 2 weeks waiting on a Judge to take it on. He has now up to 10 days to agree to the adoption and sign off on it (this is called Sentencia). Once he signs they receive the name SANJINES and legally become our children. After that we have about a week or so until we can leave the country with them.  This part of our process really does remind us of how we are adopted in Christ and how that process looks. Clearly we have shed some blood, sweat and tears in the process of them becoming ours but NOTHING compared to Christ. Once we are his we receive a new name, a new identity. 

Romans 8:14-19 

For all who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God. For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, “Abba! Father!” The Spirit himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, and if children, then heirs—heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, provided we suffer with him in order that we may also be glorified with him. For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us.

Just today Jenn spent all of about an hour working with Brandon on writing his name and writing Brandon Sanjines and explaining to him how his name was changing. While he accepts it and seems excited about it he has no idea what that truly means. It means he will be ours forever. We will never leave him, nor abandon him and he will always be called Our Son. 

This past week has been good. We went to the park almost every day. Since Ashlee is here we are taking advantage of the extra help and trying bigger better places and staying out for longer. (which results in a little longer sleeping at night...for all of us)

Jenn took the kids to a place called Divercity last week. We have got to get one of these in the states! Nick got a lot of work done that day at home and the kids learned a lot on our adventure. They basically get to "work" and "play" and earn fake money working at the hospital, firehouse, bank, school, etc and at each station they get to learn for about 20 minutes about that job and practice at it. The Vet even had a real dog for them to listen to his heart. After each job they can then go have "fun" and spend their money. It was a good place to explain that Mami and Papi work for their money to buy things just like they did that day. 

Another day, they got to dress up and play at another place we went to eat. Basically a lot of the restaurants here are kid friendly and have play places for the kids.Over the weekend we went to the Children's Museum with our friends Allyson and Scott and their little girl and that was a fun place too. It is so cool to see the difference in their behavior when we go out places now. We still count on at least a small fit from each of them over not getting ice cream or a toy, but nothing like the thrashing, kicking, screaming for no reason that we were seeing only weeks ago. We are trying to more closely identify when these things happen, are they tired, is it neurological, is it hunger? And once we nail down some triggers we try to avoid them or be prepared for them in the future. We also got to sit down and watch the Tennessee football game online with the kids. They loved cheering for our team and we all dressed in our orange. We taught them the V-O-L-S spell out and they did great. Watching that game was so good for our homesickness. As silly as it sounds it really was nice to feel at home for the night, except we still woke up here in Colombia in the morning. So clearly God still has us here for a little bit longer for a purpose. Our prayer is that we search out that purpose and continue to live for Him while we are here. 

They love to see our family on skype everyday. They also ask about going to the states just about every day, and think that every airplane they see is headed to the states. They have no idea how much LOVE is waiting for them from all of you guys!Thanks for hanging in there with us this week, sorry it took so long to get an update out. Please spend some time along with us PRAISING and PRAYING for these things. 

Prayer Requests:

-Continued bonding for us all as a family
-That they would begin to learn more English so that adapting to the US would be easier on them
-That our case would be signed off on by the judge quickly (Sentencia). Once he signs we have a week or so until we come home!
-That plane tickets would cooperate once we are closer to getting home (we don't want to stay a week longer because of adoption tickets not being available etc)

Praises:

- Michel's TB test/chest x-ray came back NEGATIVE...wahoo! No TB and no meds!
-Ashlee is here visiting us and we're having a great time so far!
-We've made some sweet friendships here and God is continuing to bless us by using them in our time here
-Judge accepted our case and they say the rest is just timing and red tape but its good news that he accepted it 

-The children's defender signed off already (this can often cause delays in the end so its great that it already happened)

Until we are home!

Third Update in Country

Whew! It's Saturday. That means we've made it here and survived 18 days of parenting these crazy 3 kiddos. We have been tired on days, busy on days, lazy some days, and we've ran and played a lot! God is continuing to show us improvements in their attitudes, behaviors, and love for us.

 

While reading a blog this week we came across this statement about Bogota that we think fits perfectly!

At first glance Bogota might appear like that perilous glass edge to a coffee table destined to be the meeting point of your child's head before he comes tumbling to the floor...disaster!

 

So true!! That exactly describes how we feel about this place. But we are surviving without too many scars!

 

This was our week.

 

Sunday- another good day at church, got to meet some cool families through facebook in person, and got to see their kiddos. Went to the mall with like 6 families for lunch and all our kids. Geesh hamburgers here are expensive but man are they worth it!

 

Monday- we took them to a movie (how to train your dragon 2) in Spanish. The theaters here are small, and you choose an assigned seat. The chairs are huge and it only cost $20 in American money for all 5 of us! You better bet we'll be seeing another here and taking advantage of that deal. They were actually pretty good in the movie. They LOVE popcorn, we have it at home some and they thought it was cool to have it there.

 

Tuesday- We went to the doctor in the afternoon to get their TB test injected. We are blessed that this Embassy doctor is walking distance, about 20 minutes or so from our place. All the other families we've met have to drive almost an hour to get to this one doctor in the city. Whew! Glad we are close.

 

Wednesday- we went to Montserrat. This is one of the highest points of any of the mountains here. It requires a cable car to get up to the top. I think we had as much fun as they did. The views were amazing. Later I told my parents that it was a strange feeling up there. You look out and the TN Girl that I am desires to see nature, mountains, beauty....well here... you only see buildings, lots of buildings, like 10 million people worth of housing. The mountains are faint in the background of all the "stuff" as we looked out I thought to myself, all these people, all these 10 million people and no one "wanted" our kids. God had to bring us all the way here to them. Oh how I long to see the Tennessee mountains and the beauty back home. This place is lost and that view just reminded us of that! It was a good day and we got some good pictures, it was cold up at the top too! Even though it's Winter here, it was the first time we've been Cold here and it was at 10,000 + ft.

 

Thursday- We hung out with our friends Allyson and Scott at a park near their house. We took the bus there, as it was a ways away, but we made it. Huge success. They are from Atlanta and are here adopting a little 3 year old girl who is just precious! She has made so much improvement in only a few days with them. So cool to be a part of their time here and share in their successes and to jointly be an encouragement to each other through the tough times.

Thursday evening we went back to the doctor. This is when we got the news that Michel tested positive for TB by her skin test. The other two were ok. So we had the doctor appointments, just a quick physical look over with the doctor over each child. He informed us of some stuff we already knew like that Daniela has ADD and that they have some speech issues in Spanish. This paperwork he did there goes on to the embassy at the end of our time here to clear them from the country. We also found out Stiven/Brandon needed many many shots and basically has had none. SO we found out there is a waiver that we filled out to wait and have all the shots back in the states the first couple of weeks we are home. Each shot here is about $150 and they all needed 2+ each. SO we are thankful to God there was the waiver and hopefully insurance will cover most at home.

 

Friday- Jenn and Michel went with our guide super early across town about an hour and half to a doctor that does chest x-rays. This has to be done since her TB skin test was positive. This is to hopefully rule out that she has TB. There is a shot they give them when they are little that is the vaccine against TB and so they often show up positive in Latin America. Nick's family has had this happen a number of times from where they got that shot as a child. We also went to a new park this afternoon and loved it.

 

Saturday- We had our friends over with their daughter and played at our house. Nick made Spaghetti. He is a cooking champ here. We miss the grill! We got to play around the house and go to a park. This park is so cool. It used to be a polo field and still has all the horse stalls etc. They have it all blocked off now open to anyone that wants to come run, play etc. Sort of like world's fair park but much much bigger. See top statement about everything being dangerous...this was a terrific safe find!!

 

It was a good week. I really felt as if I could believe no one at first when people kept telling us it would get better, it will be fine, etc. I wanted to scream. We still many times a day want to scream. But they are getting into the groove with us here. They are learning rules (we go over them every day in the morning) they are earning stars and happy faces (and occasionally sad faces for disrespecting or not listening) but they like being able to compete with each other. We have figured out that walking to the park, playing, and walking home wears them out well in the afternoon. We can't wait for our pool to open here and we can swim. This week our friend Ashlee is coming to visit and it will be great to have an extra hand and see a familiar face! She is also brining us some more games, puzzles etc. We are so thankful each day as we pray that God has provided simple things for us here like friends, kids that eat (a lot) and are not picky, a kitchen to cook in, neighbors to ask how we are and if we need anything. HE truly thinks of ALL the details!

 

One last thing we thought you'd think was funny. So we told you already that Brandon Stiven we called Brandon for the last year and when we got here they said he goes by Stiven, and the girls call him Stiven too. The past couple days Nick and I both have had separate conversations with him about what he wants to be called. We even have people ask him at church and out places. He keeps saying Brandon. So for now we look like idiots at the park yelling Stiven Stiven, Brandon Stiven and finally he answers to one. I told him he had to decide by the time school starts. Crazy Kiddo!

 

Prayers:

- Continued Bonding with the kids

-Our case was assigned to court #2. Pray this judge accepts it without question, reviews it in a timely manner and signs it so that we can work toward coming home!

-Continuing to get a good night sleep each night

-The time that Ashlee comes that kids would respect her and yet still remember we are mom and dad

-A negative result on Michel's TB chest x-ray (we really don't want her to have to take medicine for 9 months, which is the treatment if she does have it)

-Nick would be able to find time to work while we're here

 

Praises:

-a really good week with lots done

-Dr. Appointment went well for general checkup

-Case submitted to court

-Daniela got stung by a bee and no reaction, took the ice like a champ

-The kids now know to say "please" if they want something...for example, Michel will say "alzame por favor please!" which means "pick me up please please!"

-Jenn has gained back a couple of the lb she lost in the first few weeks here (Papi is a good cook)

-We are so thankful for the place we are staying, it is nice compared to others small apartments and we have room to spread out

 

We so appreciate you guys loving on us, PRAYING for us, and putting up with us!!

 

Until next week!

 

Psalm 102:

Hear my prayer, Lord;
    let my cry for help come to you.
² Do not hide your face from me
    when I am in distress.
Turn your ear to me;
    when I call, answer me quickly.

Second Update in Country

Hey Gang! So we are in our second week with the kids and the good news is we are getting better a little each day. We never knew the phrase "two steps forward one step back" would mean so much to us. We feel like this is our motto on most days. Between the fussing, fighting, screaming, kicking (and that's just what they do to us) it's hard to see that that does indeed result in STILL one step forward for us as a whole. The past couple of days have been mostly good. We are still nightly recording the days Goods and Bads and to see the "bads" list get shorter and shorter is such a Praise and one we surely are not worthy of. God has heard our crys (literally), the neighbors probably have too, and he has heard yours on our behalf and he has been so merciful to us. He has been showing us that we kick and scream and argue with him too every day and HE STILL puts up with  us. How GREAT IS OUR GOD to deal with us and the way we act toward him sometimes. When we get screamed at NOOOOO really loud or QUE NOOOO (a more emphatic "NO" in Español) and they fall on the floor whining and pouting. I cannot help but imagine myself in size 3T pajamas crying like a baby to our Heavenly Father whining about a situation, about a circumstance, etc. and Him just patiently putting up with me. Oh GOD that you would give us more of an attitude to deal with them the way you deal with us. Only with the Lord's help can we do this day to day. When we feel exhausted God gives us rest that only he can provide, and yet somehow gets us up the next morning to do it all over again. 

A few of the pictures we sent to family (that we cannot post here yet) are precious. One in particular is of the kids and a famous singer here in Bogota. His name is Christian Velez and he was born and raised in Soacha, Colombia, in an area called La Montaña (literally "The Mountain"). Our missionary friends, Trish and Emory, visit this place weekly and we hope to visit while we are here as well.  La Montaña is literally the poorest of the poor. Christian was sponsored as a world vision international child (think pennies a day feeds a child infomercial) and through love and support of his sponsors he was able to overcome the extreme circumstances there. He has since become the worship leader at Vida Bogota (the church we are attending here) and records his own music and goes on tour. For lack of a better term, he is basically Elvis around here, especially to the kids of La Montaña. It is simply amazing to see such a great success story through Christian, and it goes to show that no matter how insignificant it may seem, we all can make a difference in a child's life...from sponsoring a child, to child advocacy, to adoption, and everywhere in-between. 

We have had a difficult time enforcing rules that were completely non-existent to them before. We have to keep them out of cabinets just as you would any other kid. But we also have to keep in mind that when they get in our cabinets that could mean they are hungry, so getting them to tell us when they are hungry and also to get them to ask first is really tough. We have had great encouragement from you guys and others, so thank you for your prayers and support.

...As we finish typing this one of the kids has locked a bedroom door in the apartment. Thank God no one was inside. We are having to call a locksmith, since there are no keys to it.  All the kids are screaming and crying because we were on our way to get burgers and now we have to wait. One has literally cried herself to sleep over it while we wait on the locksmith. Ahhhhh Satan is around every corner. 

Prayers:

-Michel and Jennifer bonding... they clash about half of the day because of our attitudes and determination and I hate being told NOOOOOOOO

-That our case would be accepted by the courts quickly so that it gets to a judge (Monday is another holiday so that puts an extra day in there)

-Once it gets to a judge which can take a few days they have 10 business days to accept it (pray it would be much less) 

-Pray for our homesickness, we miss you all, family and friends and the dogs

-That our Dr. appts for the kids next week would go well (TB Test, vaccine so they can leave the country when its time, etc.)

-That we could continue bonding to them and that we'd love them more everyday despite difficulties 

Praises:

-Things are slowly getting better. We've had some fun days lately 

-We met up with some missionary friends since we have been down here and they have come to the rescue more than once and God always knows when we need them

-We had pizza/playland day and it was so fun and 1/2 price! 

-We have gotten a good routine of taking one child to the store for food and the other parent staying at home with 2 kids

-They are almost up to sleeping 9 hours and still no one peed in the bed 

Until we are home, Love,

First Update in Country

Hey Gang! So we realize we don't have as many emails as we thought we did so feel free to pass this along, especially at church we're relying on you guys to help us spread the word that we are indeed alive and God is good!

So one thing that we have been doing since getting the kids on Wednesday (besides occasionally pulling hair out and loosing weight) is to keep a list each day during the day and at night of the "goods" and "bads" of each day to look back on. When things get really loud, really overwhelming and really frustrating it is good to look at this list and see especially stuff on the "bad" list is sometimes typical kid behavior and sometimes things on the "good" list are just plain sweet for God to let us witness.

Here are some things about our trip so far.

Bogota:

The city is great, most days. Nick and I really really really miss our vehicles and didn't realize that as fun as it was to walk 8 + miles each day while it was just us here that now being trapped in the apartment is less than desirable. The apartment we've rented is nice though. The neighbors have taken great care of us and our Spanish is improving by the hour. This is a BUSY packed city! You often see people hanging out the side of the bus to pack in tight. There are lots of small markets, butcher shops (where they don't use gloves or sanitation that we saw but we ate it anyway :) and fresh fruit markets with so many fruits that we've never seen in our lives. We like it here and are trying to soak it up but if we could come home this afternoon we would do that too.

Vida Bogota

The church that we got to go to last Sunday and plan to while we are here is called Vida Bogota. You can google it or youtube it is a cool set up. We of course couldn't understand the entire sermon but the music was half English and half Spanish and the people were amazing. We spent the afternoon with 2 families until late that night and had to get a cab home. They take such good care of families here, one of the families is riding to our house tomorrow to take us on the bus for the first time to go to church as a family of 5.

The Ninos

The Kids.... while I type this sitting on the couch Stiven is watching power rangers next to me and Nick has the girls squealing in the back room they are surely jumping all over him. So we have Stiven (Brandon Stiven but apparently he goes by Stiven which we found out on Monday after calling him this for almost a year) and we have Daniela (Breidy Daniela who also goes by her middle name) and Michele Dayana who goes by Michele. We are limited to not posting pictures of their faces on social media but I'll attach one here just please don't share online.  So they are siblings...they fight as such. They have been loved by the foster family they were with but not disciplined very much. We feel that we say NO so much but we make sure we have as many or more "Buenos" Good or Good jobs! They eat a lot! They drink a lot of water. They sleep mostly through the night. They like to watch tv, play puzzles, and color. Their personalities are pretty much just as we thought. Stiven is shy, but comes out when he does something well (like finishing a 100 piece puzzle with me this morning) Daniela is very much our handful and a half. We are constantly correcting her and trying to equally love her (and her fits). Michel has Nick's whole heart already she is so spoiled! She smiles and thinks she gets whatever she wants. They all 3 already know what "popcorn" is and love having it after dinner along with a movie before bed.

Nick and Jennifer (Papi y Mami)

I should have let him write this part. We are doing ok. Honestly the most encouraging moments are to hear from my parents on Skype that we are doing good and they are proud of us. There are tough moments/hours. We have literally been on our knees singing and praying at bedtime just for them to go to sleep. The first day with them I cried...a few times... and the next day was a little less. Still at moments we feel like it and it feels so good to cry out to the Lord who put us here for his Glory! Pray for our hearts, our hugs and our kisses and our conversations at night while they sleep. Pray that Nick actually gets to work while we are here, so he can save some vacation time.

Prayer Requests:

-That we could continue bonding and attaching to each other through the tough stuff.

-That they would go to bed easier and sleep longer. This has been probably our biggest challenge so far.

-That Nick and I would have patience and be able to focus on them individually too

-That our integration meeting would go well on Wednesday and that the court process would go quickly so we can get home fast!

-That our language barriers would disappear and that we could understand them more fully

Praises:

-We do have some really sweet times with them

-they eat well (we didn't know how this would go)- Today they even said "perfecto" to our Colombian soup recipe.

-We've survived day 4 with no serious injuries, sickness, or complete lack of sleep

-We have so many people praying for us and we feel it all the time

Thank you for continuing to be behind us through this. Thanks for listening to us (ME-Jennifer) whine about things, and thank you for loving us and showing us that we are not alone and that we can do this ONLY with HIS help!

Los Quieremos (We love you)

 

Today we leave

Well the past few weeks have been utterly crazy busy that I have not gotten in bed at a decent time, ate very much, or let alone updated you guys. We are on our way to Colombia! We have bags packed, tickets bought, and work (almost) taken care of for while we are gone. We arrive late tonight and will get to go explore the city and get familiar with our surroundings for the first few days. On Monday we have what's called a team meeting. We will get to meet with the team of social workers, psychologists, and workers that have taken care of our kids for the past few years. The foster family will not be there, we are not allowed to meet them, although we may be able to send them a card passed through the office there to them. We expect this meeting will be helpful and give us any last minute updates we need on the kids. On Wednesday, August 6th we will have our "gotcha day" meaning we will go get them and they will be in our care from this day forward. The country of Colombia considers us "great friends" to the kids until they are legally ours in a month or so. Until then we can do about whatever with them except leave the country. We will try to send out emails and post on here as to how our trip is going. Please pray for us as we travel, that things would go smoothly. Pray as we meet with their team. Pray as we meet the kids and that we would start to bond with them and grow to love them.

Until we are home (in 2 months)

Official Match Granted and moving forward

We have been officially matched with the 3 kiddos we have been pursuing for some time now. When I got the phone call Beth called me first. I was in tears and quite literally fell to the ground! You guys know me I hardly ever cry...THIS. WAS. WORTH. CRYING. FOR! I got to go surprise Nick at work with sweet letters and pictures of the kids. He almost cried :) . It was a weird mix, like we knew it was coming but the sure feeling of the relief that followed was glorious! It has been nothing but 200 mph since and they assure us it will not slow down. We have been frantically planning final fundraisers, making bunk beds, painting rooms. We are trying to find clothes, shoes, and guess at sizes that might fit them according to past weight and height. We have also had 100's of pages translated from their files with medical info and background stories, this is a huge praise and my heart just hurts for mamas that get none of this information. We are praying God will use this in a mighty way in their lives one day to look back and know where they came from.

Right now we need prayer. Lots of it. We need people at dinners, and lots of hugs saying It'll be ok. We need rest, I got some while I had my wisdom teeth out and the Lord knew I would not sit still unless it took surgery and a week recovery.

We are constantly reminded how faithful God is in supplying our needs. Randomly the other day someone handed $100 over to the family hosting our spaghetti dinner, they didn't even know us just knew they wanted to be a part. We have tons of friends and family coming to help the night of the spaghetti dinner as well as tons of people donating baskets to auction off. Also a few weeks after the dinner friends will give up another night to help at Pizza Inn for a fundraiser. Whew! This takes a village LITERALLY!

We couldn't do this without you all and we are so excited to see our next steps unfold. They tell us we will be traveling in early August and we know the stay in country will be close to 8 weeks. We are trying to find a place to stay right now and think through all that would be required to travel for that long with 3 kids.

Here is our little announcement flyer about our family. Stick with us guys, the hard work is about to begin.
Oh and in case you were wondering, "B" is our oldest He is 8. "B" is our middle she is 6. and "M" is our youngest she is 4. Let the craziness begin!!!

Dossier APPROVED!!!

Hup, two, three, four... Keep it up, two, three, four

I feel like this video says it all. Inspection. Discipline. Forward progress.... Keep it up! And it also makes me laugh a lot so here ya go!  

Praise Jesus we are finally APPROVED to adopt from Colombia! What this means is great news for us. We submitted our Dossier to Colombia ICBF (central authority on children, families, and specifically adoption) back in early December. They looked over it for a few months and then came back with more questions for us. Now, about 5 months later, after reviewing our answers and the remainder of our files in country, they have said YES We the Colombian Government will allow the SANJINES family to adopt from our Country! This is such good news and such a relief. 

Our hearts are praying for the Lord and the Government of Colombia to let us adopt these 3 precious kiddos that we have identified and put in a letter of intent on. If for any reason they were to say no they don't think we'd be the best parents for these kids then on a positive note... they have still said YES we think you will be great parents to Colombian kids one day!

Nick and I both listed to a great sermon from Davis Platt on Prayer from this year's Together for the Gospel. The link to listen or watch it is HERE and is free until 4/30/14. We have both been encouraged that although the days are Looooooong as we "hurry up and wait" on an answer, that our prayers for these kids and this country are never put to waste! How encouraging is that!? Won't you please spend some time in prayer for our kids tonight with us and also for us and our hearts? HE will hear us, and HE will answer our prayers with HIS will and perfect plan! 

Isaiah 40:31 But they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.

Psalm 105:4 Look to the Lord and his strength; 
seek his face always. 

Until they are home,

Request for Evidence

Our Dossier has been in Colombia since December. It got there just before all of the Holidays began so we've been patiently waiting to hear any news about it. Well this week we got some news. We got a "request for evidence". This is a fancy way of saying they had some more questions. From what we have been told by our agency and others this is slowly becoming the "norm" now and almost every family is getting asked further questions.

This is good. We want them to ask questions. I mean come on, even we think it sounds weird that a couple with no infertility issues, as young as we are, would want to adopt, adopt internationally, and on top of that adopt more than one child! Nick and I thought we would loose some hope in their system if they were to NOT ask us more questions. Our home study and dossier have everything in it except for hair samples (which are probably somehow in there too) but we knew they still want to know more. The questions they asked were reasonable. We will now have to answer them and return our answers, translated and sealed, to Colombia as quickly as possible so they can continue to review our family.

We just wanted to update you and let you know we'd appreciate your prayers while we hurry all over town to see Dr.s and Psychologists to write letters and "evidence" to support our family in our attempt to adopt. We are praying the people that accept the answers will indeed accept them and approve us and we can move forward. The scary thing is there are no "for sure" situations in adoption, and this, unfortunately, is one of those not for sure times. We could submit these answers and they could move us along, or they could say no. We aren't really thinking about what would happen if they said no. Only that God is in control of every detail (see last post) and we are confident in that. That being said our "details" that we give to the Colombian government need to be quick, accurate, and honest.

Thank you for praying along with us.

Back in School

So last weekend we left Empowered to Connect conference in Birmingham. We got to meet some new friends and got to see our favorite social worker from Lifeline. Our brains are on total over load right now. We loved every minute of it! I'm finding myself just loving to learn lately. It seems like just about everyday I'm reading an article, practicing Spanish, searching blogs, and now after this weekend we will be doing more research into nutrition and sensory issues that our kids will be dealing with. In the midst of all of our learning I'm feeling a little stuck. I'm stuck thinking when are we actually going to get to use this stuff. How much longer!?

 Nick and I are both not emotional about many things, I am the more emotional one of the two, but friends even comment to us, do y'all not ever get mad or upset or sad. I think I only cried at two points of our wedding day.Ok... maybe three but compared to most I'm a little dry. It's not that the emotions are not there. It's not that I hold them in and then explode either. I'm not sure why God has made us this way.I'm not sure and that's ok. 

While we were in Birmingham we were at church on Sunday with one of our most admired pastors and speakers. We missed our home church family but were happy to be at church with our Lifeline family. He reminded us that as they have been reading though Genesis just as our church has, at all the details and what some call "coincidences" but what he referred to as an "orchestra of God's moves". This picture of God orchestrating all the little details has just been so prevalent on my heart lately. He made mention of his family's adoption journey and how in their failed attempts at pregnancy and adoption that God was using that to culminate to him leaving to go to Nepal (where they had to stop their adoption). He said never would he have made up or even dreamed up that years ago after their struggles and often asking "God why"" that he would be going on this trip. 

So to be honest with you, the sibling group we are currently reviewing has a little girl in it. She is the younger of the two girls and her birthday was during the conference. We both made it though the day, we prayed for her and thought of her often. Because we don't know if officially she is ours I wasn't as heartbroken as I thought I might be that we'd missed her birthday. God once again why did you make me this way? I want to be emotional about it,I want to be overwhelmed with love for this little girl who is now another year older and without a mom and dad. The second little girl in this sibling group has a birthday coming up in only a matter of days. Please pray for her as she too, only days after her sister, will be missing a mom and dad on her birthday. 

The fact that God is orchestrating our details, rather they lead to her and her siblings or to different kids, or whatever,

the thing I keep getting overwhelmed and "emotional" about is the fact that we serve a God who is always planning, always doing, always figuring, always loving, always disciplining, always true, always real, and always faithful. 

I try to be so many things and it's ok if emotional wreck is not one of them right now, I'm sure that will come with time and then I'll wish I was back the way I am now. But I just love that even though I'm on information overload God had reminded me that He has called us to Live Recklessly for Him and he is using each feature of who he is to bring us closer to our kids and to make us into every detail he has designed us to be as believers, as parents, as husband and wife, and most importantly as children of His.

Thank you God for allowing us to learn so much it hurts. Thank you that in your prefect timing we'll get to unleash it all on our kids with love and that until then we can laugh about all the "use your words" and things we say to each other anticipating having to say them to the kids one day. God keep us sustained though this journey. Please let little M & B feel a special kind of love on their birthdays. Let them know they are fiercely being pursued and that we are able to do so because you so lovingly pursued us and have taught us what it looks like to love like crazy and trust in your details.

In the next day or two I will try to post an update on our actual "process" after talking with our Social Worker.

I am going to also be posting more information for you as our family and friends so that you can Learn along with us, so stay tuned! Here is the one for Empowered to Connect.
http://empoweredtoconnect.org/

Dossier In!! Now What?!

HUGE PRAISE and Awesome UPDATE!!! Our Dossier is in Colombia and is fully translated! What does that mean?!
Let me back up. What is a Dossier? dos·si·er
noun-1.a collection of documents about a particular person, event, or subject.

So our "collection of documents" has pretty much everything in it except for real life blood samples! I think I caught our social worker stealing hair from my brush for this thing. (kidding about the hair) but seriously they do know our blood types! So for weeks they were translating this mega folder...anyone picturing a 10 ft long filing cabinet... and translating can be difficult when you want it to be as accurate as possible but also have to watch out that something said in English might be reworded in Spanish and sound weird. We can't have us sounding weird, we are already crazy! So we got a call from B at the agency and she said she had great news before Christmas and it was that our Dossier had arrived Safely and fully translated in Colombia. 
-Sidenote-whew so glad someone at fedex didn't steal every ounce of our personal info and get this thing into the wrong hands, this is the reason I pay $20 to ship a package :)

We have been assured that (contrary to our original thinking) it would not begin to collect dust on someones desk that they are actually reviewing our family and our files get passed around to multiple offices, officials, regions, etc. So nice to know its moving somewhere and not just sitting there. So right now the courts and ICBF close for a few days for Christmas and New Years and after that they open back up and will be back to reading ours (and numerous other families) Dossiers and decide rather to approve them or not. 
-Scary little known fact, even though the USA said we are approved that does not mean Colombia has to agree. They could say no. We are confident, however, that if the Lord has brought us this far he will not drop us off (literally) on someones desk to be told NO!

So now we wait a little bit. About 3 months is average for the officials to approve a family. 
During this time you will be anxious to know what we are doing....well....we are reviewing files! Yes reviewing, like reviewing as in we get to PICK, it sounds terrible and confusing and heartbreaking and it is a little of all of the above but also a little cool too that God would guide us in the direction of what Colombia names "waiting children." These kidos are who our agency has such a heart for. They are mostly "special needs" - If you do not know already about what is considered special needs in other countries please look up some examples of it before you come chasing me down asking "what are you doing!" You will gasp and gag at what they call "special needs" in other countries, some of them are huge lifelong needs and some are as minor as needing glasses, it floors me that they are all in the same category and that no one wants these kids because of these big or small issues. 
(END of rant about that)

We currently have files for a sibling group of 3 kids we are praying about. We are praying God would reveal to us whether they are our kids or someone elses. We are praying for their safety, for their health, for their hearts, and most importantly that our Savior would grab hold of them for his name sake and find them a family! We are having some files translated (3 English pages=30 Spanish pages) so its fun to see and "get to know" them through paper and through tests that tell things like "she's artistic" or "he likes pets". Things that would not make or break our decision in any way but just things to start to get to know them.

 Think of it like an ultra sound. We are getting to hear their heartbeat and see them move and grow 

(sort of) :)

So what can you be doing? I only have 1 answer for that, or maybe two. 
--ONE- PRAY, pray for us, pray for our agency, pray for our kids (whether its them or not that we currently have these files) pray for our life after we're home, pray for us to be diligent in our Spanish learning attempts. 
--TWO-Encourage. Don't get me wrong we both need to hear the "my friend has these kids and they are crazy" stories but please if you are going to "encourage" us with opinions let them first be thought through twice and please also remember that we have thought this whole thing through and even though there are about 1,000,000 answers to questions we don't have right now one HUGE answer we do have is that God is behind us and yet pulling us through this at the same time. He is the one who has CALLED us to do this and even though we know you love us (think we're crazy) thats ok! We like being different, we like being "not normal" we like being known as the crazy couple adopting siblings! We are excited and nervous all at the same time. 

We are thankful and happy to have you as a part of this with us. THANK you for staying with us and thank you for asking~ It means a lot to me, personally, and to Nick, to get to talk about it with friends and people who are curious.

Goal for 2014: Update the blog once per month! Here's to January!